The statements below are true. But they also present the truth in a humorous way. Most of these were gleaned from a book, "The Definitive Book of BODY LANGUAGE," by Allan and Barbara Pease (Bantam Books, 2004). So read on and be amused. But to be really enlightened, read some books on how to decipher body language.

What signal alerts you that a politician is lying? His lips are moving!

The fortune-teller gazed into her crystal ball and then started laughing uncontrollably. So her client punched her on the nose! It was the first time he'd struck a medium.

If you see a person scratching his head, it could mean he's uncertain. But-it's also a sign of dandruff.

Submissive dogs show their throats; submissive humans show their palms.

If you smile constantly, everyone will wonder what you've been up to.

Studies show that women laugh at men they're attracted to, while men are attracted to women who laugh at them.

When a man says a woman has a good sense of humor, he doesn't mean that she tells jokes. No, he means that she laughs at HIS jokes.

Tie an Italian's hands behind his back and he'll be speechless.

Lawyer to a witness: "You seem like an honest, intelligent man." "I'd return the compliment, sir," said the witness, "but I'm under oath."

He married her for her looks, but not the ones she's been giving him lately.

Why do men have trouble making eye contact with women? Breasts don't have eyes.

Ever wonder why women the world over are spending millions on developing cleavage and breast enhancement? After all, breasts are little more than enlarged sweat glands.

Men, shown photos of just the butt cracks and cleavage of women, can't seem to tell the difference.

A point to remember before setting up a dinner business meeting: no one ever makes a decision with their mouth full.